Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Girls Are Like Apples

“Girls are like apples...the best ones are at the top of the trees. The boys don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they just get the rotten apples that are on the ground that aren't as good, but easy. So the apples at the top think there is something wrong with them, when, in reality, they are amazing.”

I found that quote on a website where girls post questions for other girls to respond to. I copied it and sent it out to a bunch of people I know to get their reaction.

I found it interesting that almost all of the women thought of themselves as the apples on the top of the tree; not one of them associated with the apples on the ground.

That only makes sense, of course - no one wants to think of themselves as less than perfect.

Yet, to be honest, that’s exactly what I first thought : that I was one of the apples on the ground, good looking enough to catch some man’s attention at first, but not good enough to hold it so they toss me aside and go for the next one they see.

I also found it interesting that the one man who responded told me that men aren’t even looking for apples in the first place. They want “a real peach” not a “sour apple.”

Food for thought…


I was at the mall the other day, for my routine Letter-Writing session at The Perfect Cup. I had time on my hands so I stopped in at one of those jeweler chain stores to have my ring cleaned and inspected. After looking at it for a while, the girl behind the counter informed me that I needed to have the prongs replaced because the existing ones were wearing thin.

I went back a week later to have them do just that, having finally figured out how I was going to pay for it. This time a different girl helped me: she cleaned the ring again, filled out the paperwork, and inspected in thoroughly under a microscope.

She ended up finding a crack in the diamond, so had to call her manager to see what to do about that. They told her that they would not work on it because of the liability issues, so she recommended that I take it to a local jeweler to see what they said about it. So, just today I took a drive out to Michael’s Jewelry on 36th and Arctic.

Boy, am I glad I did.

They told me that not only were the prongs on the ring just fine, there was nothing wrong with the diamond at all. No crack, no chance of it falling apart on my finger, and no reason to spend any money on it.

They spiffed it up for me, double checked everything, and even gave me a rough appraisal on it. Come to find out the ring is worth at least $3,000.00!!!


Sunday, September 26, 2010

My New Roommate

My new roommate moved in this weekend. So far, she’s a very nice person. I think it will work out well this time around.

But boy, does she have a lot of stuff. I’m feeling very “invaded” at the moment; almost like she’s taking over the house. This will certainly take some getting used to. The kitchen is crammed to overflowing with her stuff – she likes to cook, so came with all her pots, pans, dishes, and supplies. I’ve given her a shelf downstairs in the garage, and it is full to overflowing as well. I lost track of how many boxes of stuff went upstairs to her room: I have no idea how she’s organizing everything.

At least the girls like her. They’ve been supervising the move to make sure it’s all inspected and kosher. They both slept like logs last night, too. They’re probably still sleeping, come to think of it.

Before she arrived, I had to get some furniture moved out of the room upstairs, and that’s not an easy thing to do when you have a bad back. Normally, I would ask Rob to help – but he’s made himself somewhat less than available lately, so I was rather in a quandary. Thankfully, one of the guys from work came to my rescue – for which I am very grateful. He had the bed taken apart and moved in no time.

As I left the house for my routine Sunday lunch at The Perfect Cup, she was actually heading out the door to bring ANOTHER moving van full of stuff!

Good lord, help me…

Friday, September 24, 2010

Who Knew!

Quite a few people complained about my decision to not send out Blog Update notices any more – so I changed tactics and went a different direction. I must admit, I’m surprised at the response I got.

I sent out an email asking people to let me know if they wanted to continue getting the notices – and got Twenty-Two responses.

Twenty-Two people actually read my blog!

Who knew my life would be that interesting, because from where I sit – it ain’t that grand.

But I am touched. Thank you all for caring enough to slog thru all the boring day-to-day stuff just so that once in a while you can glean something worth reading.

Monday, September 20, 2010

Pet Sitter for Hire

I put an ad out on Craig’s List the other day selling myself as a Pet Sitter for Hire. I figured it was an easy way to make some extra money now that I have both the time and the need for it. It wasn’t 3 days and I got my first job!

I took care of the nicest dog: she was a 7-year old German Shepherd – Husky mix named Ojos Locos (means: Crazy Eye in Mexican). Her human had to leave the statue unexpectedly, so needed somebody to walk the dog just for two days until a friend could take over.

It wasn’t the best job ever: I am more of a cat person, after all. And it was only two days worth. But still, she lived close to Taku Lake so we got to go down to the park twice each day for our exercise.

That’s quite a busy little park, by the way. The first day we were there we saw two kayaks in the lake, a bunch of ducks in the lake, a juvenile eagle fishing in the lake, and an elderly (rather fat) black lab fetching a stick his human kept throwing into the lake. Not to mention all the other dogs making the circuit around the lake with us.

Ojos did so well, too. She’s very polite and quiet: hardly ever said a word or pulled at her leash. The only time she ever made a fuss was when a squirrel ran past us. Apparently we hate squirrels. With a passion. Even the moose on the side of the trail didn’t elicit that much of a response!

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Thick As Pea Soup

Anchorage has been blanketed in a thick fog for the past few days. Thick enough to have closed down the airport even. I look out my window and can’t see my next door neighbor. It’s like living in the Twilight Zone or something.

Very strange.

It does some very strange things to sound, also. The other night I was driving home from the movie theatre when all of the sudden I heard this very loud sound coming at me from every direction at once. I thought maybe my car was coming apart as I drove it. Obviously it wasn’t, or I wouldn’t have made it home in one piece to write this post. But it actually took me a while to realize what was going on.

Sadly, a woman was found dead this morning of a car accident. They believe that, while speed certainly was a contributing factor to her death, the fog also had something to do with it. Perhaps she just didn’t see the bend in the road until it was too late. She leaves behind twin 14-year olds.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

My Life, So Far

My Job:

My hours have been cut back to just 20 hours a week due to the winter season. This means that I go in to work each day at 1:00 and leave at 5:00. This also means that any other job I may find will have to (hopefully) accommodate that schedule: not very likely. I am looking for a part-time job somewhere else to supplement my income, but might actually have to quit so I can go back on unemployment because I just can’t afford not to.

My House:

While I am so very thankful to have not had a roommate these past few weeks (I simply don’t think I could have dealt with one, what with all the emotional turmoil going on) I have once again put an ad out for another one. I need that extra income if I am to continue to make my house payments. I had hoped I could sneak by without on entirely, but at least I had this much of a break.

My Heartache:

I have learned a thing or two during all of this. One: each person who has a broken heart (and I know several at the moment) wants to believe that their pain is the worst ever, and that no other person on the planet has hurt as much as they do. They don’t want to hear about your own heartache, and really don’t want to hear that they need to “just get over it” and “move on”. Two: well… shoot… I can’t remember number two. I’m sure it was very interesting and thought-provoking. Maybe if I stew on it a little while, it will come back to me.

My House Chores:

I’m not getting a red door after all. I don’t have the tools or the know-how, nor do I have the strength to do it myself – and the one who was to have helped me has moved on. So, I returned the paint and got refunded the whole $8.00 and am just thankful that at the very least I did get my peephole installed. I did manage to finish up the garage door by myself but have given up on the roof and gutters. They will just have to wait till later: I simply don’t have the mental strength to worry about them at the moment.

My Blog:

I’m not going to send out notices any more for the updates on this thing. Those of you who are interested know where to go by now, and those of you who aren’t interested probably don’t want to keep getting my little nudges anyway.

My Cats:

Djuna has finally come back around to me. She’d been avoiding me like the plague these past few weeks: she really doesn’t like stress. So that means either I’m getting better or she’s getting cold. Probably the latter – I’ve actually had to turn the furnace on a few nights in a row! Thing and Djuna both love to snuggle up in my lap while I watch movies or whatever.

My Weight Loss:

I dug out my old ring the other day to see if it fit: and it did! I haven’t been able to wear it in well over 4-5 years. I’m quite happy about that. I’m still in a size 10 but am still losing weight – soon enough I will be back into an 8 again. That will put me at the size I was when I graduated from high school, and that ain’t bad.

Green Building Council:

I have stepped down as chair of the local chapter. They really needed somebody who could devote more time and attention to their cause than I have been able to lately. I thoroughly enjoyed it while I was up there – but know that they will be just fine without me. I still support the cause, and really wish them the best – but honestly I’m not even in the industry anymore.

Making Cards:

I stopped making cards lately, too. Honestly, I just have no interest in anything at all – but do want to take it up again. I do enjoy making them, and have plenty on hand to work on. I did cancel my monthly kit, however – no point in paying for something I’m not even using. If and when I get back in to it, and work through all the back-log, then I can always sign up again.

Get Over It:

I know this is a lot of negativity here. But honestly – I don’t care. This is how I feel at the moment, and I’m tired of worrying about what other people think. If you don’t like how I feel at the moment, well… too bad.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Back On the Market

My job at the construction company just went into winter-mode; meaning my hours have been cut back to just 20 hours a week. This will be until sometime in March or April, where they will ramp back up to full-time again.

In the meantime, I am back looking for a job. I would like to find a part-time job to simply supplement my income, but if I have to I will accept a full-time position and quit the construction company. If that does happen, I will either get re-hired again by them in the springtime, or simply continue on with whatever job I can find = it all depends on money.

It all boils down to the money.

Speaking of which, I’ve also placed another add for a roommate. I have a furnished bedroom with a private bath to offer for $600.00 a month, if you know of anybody looking for a place to live. I would prefer a female, but that is negotiable.

You know what would really be cool? I would LOVE to get a job down in Antarctica! I would go in a heartbeat… I don’t know what I would do with my house or my girls, but I would go.

Sunday, September 12, 2010


I feel quite foolish, I have to admit. My emotions got control of me a few days ago, and it wasn’t pretty.

It all started innocently enough. I was reading the paper on-line, just like I always do. I came across an article talking about the body that had been pulled from the Kenai River earlier that day. They didn’t know who it was, but said the man was roughly 40 years of age, and that he was being sent to the coroner’s in Anchorage for identification.

Now, a logical normal person would simply mutter to themselves “How horrible for that man’s family…” and move on to the next article in the paper.

But no – my Emotions immediately started yelling at me “Oh My God! That’s Him! He’s Dead! That’s why he’s not answering his phone! He’s Dead!”

I got myself so worked up about it I had to call my friend Katie to talk me back down to reality. She agreed with my logical side by saying that the odds of it actually being him were so low as to be almost impossible, but then also said that she could not say with 100 percent certainty that it was not him. There was that slim possibility that he had actually gone and drowned himself, either intentionally or accidentally.

She surprised me – twice over – by making a few suggestions.

First, she said I should do a drive-by to assure myself that his truck was in fact parked in his driveway. She did stress that she was only advocating ONE drive-by, and that if I found myself doing another one that it would be a really bad thing. If I should find myself doing yet ANOTHER drive-by I should consider myself a stalker and get professional help immediately.

Then she advised me to call the cops! She said if I explained my situation, and told them that I just had a gut feeling that it was him, they could then assure me that it wasn’t.

Needless to say I did neither of those things. Instead I just waited a day – both to give myself time to find my own way back down to reality, and to see what the next day would bring.

It brought him.

He actually came to my house to drop off the key I’d asked for.

I cried for two hours after he left, but was at the same time so relieved to see him alive and well.

It’s a crazy mixed-up world I’m living in right now.

Sunday, September 05, 2010

A Much-Needed Reason to Feel Good About Myself

As mentioned in my previous posting, I have lost a bit of weight recently. While I am actively trying to lose weight, and have been for almost a year now, I do have to admit that these last few weeks have been so horribly stressful: I’m sure that has contributed in a very big way to my reduction in size. Regardless of how I’ve lost it, I am just going to go with the great good feeling of having actually lost over 30 pounds!

To celebrate, I treated myself today. I stopped in at Old Navy and got two new pair of pants – both a size 10. That’s 4 whole sizes smaller than I was a year ago! I only have one more size to lose to achieve my goal size. I am so very happy about that.

I also plan to stop in at Eddie Bauer’s tomorrow. I heard a rumor that they will actually take back ones you’ve worn that are too big and exchange them for ones that do. I’m hoping to prove that rumor true and walk out of there with several nice pair for work.

I also treated myself to a trip to the bookstore today, and got four really good books. Well, I haven’t actually read them yet, so don’t actually know that they’re good - but they at least look like they will be good books, and they all come highly recommended.

He’s just not that into you
     by: Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo

Wesley the Owl: the Remarkable Love Story of an Owl and his Girl
     by: Stacey O’Brien

The Whale: In Search of the Giants of the Sea
     by: Philip Hoare

The Windup Girl
     by: Paolo Bacigalupi

Seward By Train

I got to spend the day with my friend Lorna yesterday. She had a companion fare (two for the price of one) on a round-trip ticket on the Alaska Railroad to Seward and back, so we took advantage of that – and saved a nice $119.00 in the process!

It was horribly early, though. Poor Thing did NOT want to get up at 4:30 in the morning. She protested loudly the entire time we were in the bathroom brushing our teeth and combing our hair. I’m fairly certain she went right back to bed the moment I left.

The train left Anchorage at 6:00 and we arrived in Seward around 11:00 – with some very beautiful scenery in between times! Lorna had her camera out, but mine never even left my backpack. Oh well, she took plenty of pictures for the both of us, and much better quality ones to boot!

Once in Seward, we donned our rain gear and started waking. First stop was at the Railway Cantina for a bite to eat. If you’ve never eaten there, I highly recommend it. They serve Burritos and Quesadillas with home-made salsa – and have quite an extensive selection of beer to choose from. Lorna chose the Garlic Quesadilla while I had the Smoked Salmon Quesadilla (minus the cheese).

Once our lunch was consumed we took off for the Seward SeaLife Center, which is always my favorite thing to do in Seward. The seabird exhibit is my favorite: I think we spent most of our time out there with all the birds! We did get to see the entire place, though – and had a good time. She got some really cool photos of the Wolf Eel, a handsome looking fellow if ever there was one.

I need to take a moment here to brag a little bit – I need all the confidence boosting I can get at the moment, so bear with me.

A year ago, I was in Seward about this same time of year with my then-roommate Trish. She and I also went to the Sealife Center, and while there I stepped up onto the scales where you are supposed to compare your own weight with that of the male Steller’s Sea lion, Woody. At that time I am slightly ashamed to admit that I weighed 196 pounds (my worst ever).

Yesterday I again stepped up on the scales and found that I now weigh 165 pounds! Yay!!! This means that I have been steadily losing weight at a rate of an average 2.5 pounds a month, and also means that I will reach my goal weight within roughly 6 months - assuming that I continue losing at the same pace.

And that ain’t bad!

Meanwhile, back in Seward, Lorna and I then walked the coastline back to the harbor and then proceeded to walk up and down each dock to look at all the boats. By the time we’d seen everything there is to see in the harbor, we decided that some fresh handmade Gellato sounded perfect, so stopped in at the Sweet Darlings store and got us a little bowl: I had the Fruit of the Forest flavor (blueberries, raspberries, and some other type of berry that I can’t remember) while Lorna tried the Blood Orange flavor. Both were just scrumptious and were exactly what we needed.

We still had an hour left before our train was due to depart, so we headed over to the bar for a drink and a game of Cribbage. I don’t have a cribbage board, so we just kept score on paper. I need to get me one, actually – must put that down on my list for tomorrow’s shopping spree.

The ride home on the train was just as nice as the morning’s trip had been. Lorna and I talked the entire way back: playing cards, drinking tea, and laughing. It was such a nice reprieve from my own personal troubles.

I got home and put myself to bed by 11:30 that night, tired but happy.

Friday, September 03, 2010


It’s been a long hard week, but with a lot of help from my friends, I’ve actually managed to get thru it. Now the real hard part begins: getting through the weekend.

Honestly, I could not have done as well as I have without my friends. I really want to thank each and every one of you: your help and support has been invaluable, as well as your patience and forgiveness. I do realize that my sob story is getting old, and I am doing everything I can to contain it – or at the very least be able to manage on my own.

The tears still hit me at odd times, showing up unexpectedly and completely unwelcomed. It’s rather odd, actually. One day I’m fine: I can talk about it and analyze things rationally and logically – then the next day just the mere mention of his name can send me over the edge again. Trust me; I can’t wait for that part to be over.

I have lined out a strategy designed to help me make sense of the whole situation, and think it is actually working. It will take time, I’m sure – but eventually maybe someday I’ll actually be able to look at a phone and not think about calling him! Won’t that be wonderful?

I sincerely hope that he is dealing with this as well, and that he isn’t just ignoring it in hopes that it will go away. He has a lot of pain and heartache of his own that needs to be processed and dealt with somehow. Men in general aren’t known for their proclivity to reach out for help; but I think that is what he needs to do. He is obviously not dealing with it well on his own.

If any of you out there knows him, perhaps you can reach out to him? No, that’s meddling - and is exactly the kind of things I’m not supposed to be doing.

It sure is hard to let go…