And So It Begins

First of all – let me go on record as having stated that I hate this. I mean, I really, really – full on – no holds bared – hate this. I absolutely hate the fact that I have to find a new job.

I apparently live in a dream world where people can retire at a job after 20+ years of service. That’s what I wanted – a place I could stay at for the rest of my working life. But, that is not reality and here I am looking for work.

I actually made a bit of a dent yesterday. I called my Dentist and canceled my appointment: the money I wanted to use before I lost it is effectively lost anyway, and the procedure he wanted to do costs way too much on my budget now. Assuming any new job I find has dental insurance, I’ll reschedule.

Next in line on the phone list was my stock broker. I wanted to tell her, since this does affect the choices we make. She suggested that we sell a certain stock in my regular account: it was up from when I bought it, but she expected it to go down soon what with the current state of affairs – and this frees up another chunk of change that can be accessed if needed. I also wanted to let her know that I’ll be rolling over my 401k money soon.

Earthwatch was next – and this one really hurt. I had to cancel my plans for Africa. I still will go someday, just not this coming year as I’d planned. Even if I get a new job tomorrow, I’ll still not be able to go since most places don’t give 3-weeks vacation during your first year on the job.

Sigh…

By this time it was 1:00 so I headed over to the mall, where I deposited my checks, bought stamps, mailed off my letters, and sat in my favorite coffee shop for lunch and did a chapter of my Human Anatomy book.

It felt good to get out of the house, except for that little voice in the back of my head that keeps tallying up the cost of lunch and gas, and subtracting the sum from my dwindling bank account. I need to weigh the pros and cons on this: is it better to get out even though it costs, or should I stay in and conserve on spending so that my money will last?

Friends and co-workers have been so helpful; I already have a list of potential job opportunities, and it hasn’t even been but a few days. All I have to do is get my resume dusted off and updated. That’s the plan for today, but I must admit that depression is already starting to set in, and the couch is so comfortable.

I will just have to make myself get up occasionally and get moving so it doesn’t settle in permanently.